The post-Covid syndrome
When I was infected by Omicron, I had some strange experiences. (I have detailed them in a previous note.https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=5239453802745326&id=100000422755205)
I have read that post-Covid patients suffer from some form of physical or mental changes. https://www.cdc.gov/.../2019.../long-term-effects/index.html Some unlucky ones just kick the bucket off and go away!!!!! Omicron couldn’t do any harm to me physically but has succeeded in altering the way I normally think in my life.
Formerly, I was keen on completing work on time but hadn’t been tormented mentally about what would happen if I didn’t complete the work within the estimated time. There were only a few occasions I had to regret any work I couldn’t finish as scheduled or not doing it altogether.
Now my thoughts have been altered in a different way.
A feeling has crept into my mind that I have not been doing the work which I have been capable of doing and instead indulge in some minor works which are not worth doing at all! This puts another fear into my mind that I am not doing anything worthwhile and is just wasting my life. The moment this thought comes to my mind, I become over-enthusiastic and stop doing that work and turn to another one which of course is harder than the previous one. I know this frantic effort is to convince my mind that I am not wasting my life and is living a useful one. Sadly, after some time I will be attempting another still harder work! This way I start different works and do not finish any of them at the end of the day. Uma and my mother used to make fun of me for my way of doing work but I made them understand that I was pretty aware what I was doing was not right and had to struggle to resist the temptation of switching aimlessly from one work to another. On certain days when the thought becomes severe that I should do some really good job, I do very hard work and try to convince my mind that I was not just running away from work. I am like the sailor carrying the treacherous old man on his shoulders in the popular story ‘The old man of the sea’. The only difference is, in my case in the place of the old man the 'post corona syndrome' is weighing me down.
Now Uma and my mother feel sorry when they see me work in the backyard or find me sitting by the computer for hours!
I will definitely overcome this weird kind of feeling shortly and will not let Coronavirus take me for a ride!!
If one has gone nuts he/she wouldn’t personally know what drives him/her to do weird things. But in my case, I know pretty well that this is a surreal thought but I cannot resist it completely!
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